My hands were sore from gripping the steering wheel. My husband and I were driving from LA to Sacramento, and sign after sign warned of gusty winds through the valley.

At first it looked like fog. When we moved through it, I felt like I was driving through a blizzard, only instead of snow it was dirt. We made our way through sand storm after sand storm. To make matters worse, the wind was whipping tumbleweeds across the road.

Then a six-foot tumbleweed came at us from the left. Now, tumbleweeds are not super heavy or dense, but get one stuck on your windshield, and you’re in for instant trouble, like the flipped car we saw a few miles up the road.

This tumbleweed was taller than the car, so I wasn’t sure what would happen if we hit it head on. Thankfully, the timing was such that it hit the side of the car rather than the windshield. I swerved a bit and kept on going, hoping for the best for the cars behind me as I breathed a sigh of relief and gratitude.

I trembled a little as I continued to drive, and used my breath to calm my nervous system. As I thought about how thankful I was that it only hit the side of the car, I dove a little deeper into gratitude, a topic that’s permeating the air waves as we look celebrate Thanksgiving this week here in the U.S.

It’s easy to be grateful when you have a scary, near-miss experience like we did with the tumbleweed and the accident we saw. For a moment nothing else matters, except that you’re safe. You’re completely in the present, and happy to be alive.

It takes a little more effort to cultivate gratitude consciously. I love the shift in perspective that I see so many people taking during this time of year and all of the sweet social media posts showing thankfulness.

Yet the very next day after Thanksgiving, the mood shifts from gratitude to scarcity, standing in line, and fighting to buy the perfect gift at unbeatable prices and show everyone that you have just as much as them.

There’s nothing wrong with making and spending money, trying to get good deals and showering those you love with gifts. The problem is when it comes with violence or when it takes you away from contentment (Santosha) and your purpose (Dharma).

Even in my own attempts to cultivate thankfulness, I sometimes find myself saying, “Yes, I’m grateful for all these things I have, but…I really want this. Or I really want that. Or I’ll be ok when I have this. Or I’ll be happy when this happens.” I’m future-oriented naturally, so it’s easy for me to keep looking to what’s next, instead of relishing in the present moment and finding contentment (Santosha).

When you delay your happiness until you “have enough” or until the circumstances are just right, you’re robbing yourself of the joy and peace that you can have in any given moment.

Gratitude is complex with different layers, and yoga invites you to go deeper than simply being grateful for what you have during one month out of the year.

The yoga philosophy principle of abundance or non-stealing (Asteya) helps you trust that you have enough. When you live from scarcity, you spend a lot of energy trying to get more and make sure nobody takes what’s “yours.” Then you have less energy for the things that really matter in life: your health, your relationships, or whatever it is that you find meaningful. This focus on getting more, on having enough, can wear down your overall wellbeing. You miss out on life and put off happiness for a time that will never come, because when your orientation is scarcity, there is never enough.

When you live with a deep knowing that there is enough to go around, you find the generosity to give of whatever you have.

Similarly, the yoga philosophy practice of self-reliance or non-jealously (Aparigraha) helps you trust that not only do you have enough, you ARE enough. There’s no need to kill yourself trying to keep up with your neighbors or colleagues or siblings. Just because everyone else at work drives a BMW or Mercedes, doesn’t mean you can’t drive your Toyota into the parking lot with pride. You’re not “less than” just because your friends are going on that retreat and the timing isn’t right for you. You can let go of the fear of missing out (FOMO) on the knowledge you would gain from that online course that you want to buy and will probably never complete.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with making money. The ancient texts say that you need to make money so that you have the means (Artha) to fulfill your purpose. I also realize that I am writing this from a place of privilege, and many people are out there struggling just to put food in their bellies. We all have a role to play in helping each other find their own “enough,” which is hard to do if you don’t take time to acknowledge what you already have.

At the same time, one of the most powerful yogic practices related to gratitude is that of surrendering to the Divine (Ishvara Pranidhana). When you keep expecting things to be different and delaying your happiness until they are, you miss out on the gift of what’s right in front of you. Sometimes not getting what you think you need, or even experiencing something you don’t want, is the biggest possible blessing.

Whether it’s the traffic that slows you down and keeps you from getting into an accident, the job you didn’t get that keeps you available for an even better offer, or a break up that you didn’t want but you then realize frees you from a subtly abusive mate, life has a way of giving what you need, even if you can’t see it in that moment.

It doesn’t mean you don’t work and just let whatever happen. You have to do your part. Trusting in the wisdom of whatever your version of the Divine is can totally shift your experience from struggle to acceptance to gratitude to contentment.

Finding gratitude for what you have, who you are, and even for the things you don’t want as you trust in the wisdom of the Divine is what allows contentment (Santosha) to arise.

Speak Your Truth

What’s your favorite gratitude practice? What helps you feel a sense of abundance and self-reliance? How would your life be different if you could find gratitude even for the experiences you don’t want? What do you struggle with when you try to find abundance, self-reliance, trust and contentment? Comment below and let me know!

I’m so very thankful for you, and for every time you stop by, for your comments and replies. I’m truly grateful for every time you come to class, and for yoga and how life has brought us together.

Know that you have enough, you are enough, and the Divine has your back. Rest in this knowing and let that contentment flow.

In wellness, joy, and light,

Tami